There is a term in psychology called Self-Efficacy, which basically means that one has the belief that they can achieve whatever it is they want to do. If you ask most people if they feel they can perform a task or achieve a goal, they would most likely give a resounding “Yes!” But if that is the case, why is then that most are not reaching their goals or finding the life they desire? It’s usually because deep down inside they don’t really believe that they can; those nasty inner voices we all have seem to rear their ugly heads and put on their ‘debby-downer’ hat on as they negate anything and everything positive.
In order to overcome those thoughts and reach your desires, you have to fully – and without a doubt – believe that you possess the skills and strengths to do so. This is not as easy as it may seem; you see, those ‘debbie-downers’ have a strong-hold on the psyche and lie buried very deep in the mind, so even if you consciously say “I can do anything I want” they are secretly saying ‘you can’t.’ It can be pretty complicated but just know that we are driven more by the unconscious thoughts than what is in our awareness.
If you have problems in starting or reaching your goals, I’d suggest exploring your deeper thoughts to see if your belief system is what’s holding you back:
1. Take time to sit and think – sit in silence and focus on your breaths as this will calm your mind and allows your thoughts to surface. You can ask a question before doing so to give a bit more focus to what you want to uncover, such as “What is holding me back?”
2. Take time to write – often, the act of writing out your thoughts or exploring them will produce answers that can help you identify the barriers; writing can also help you to challenge your thoughts, as they are yours alone, which can help you to see that it may not be a rational one. Writing can also affirm all that you are doing so the irrational thoughts don’t hold weight – after all, you’ve reached some goals in your life, haven’t you?
3. Take time to affirm – telling yourself that you absolutely have all the abilities to do anything you want will elevate your ego and change the negatives to the positive (this doesn’t mean doing so one time); repeating a mantra daily, either by saying it or writing it, gets into the deeper parts of the brain which then changes the thought processes and ultimately the belief system. It does take patience and practice so consistency is the key.
Having the total belief that you can do and be all that you want is the key to long-lasting success; choosing to believe, which means quieting the nay-sayers, will elevate your ego and confidence so you can go and do and be your best. You can do it – I believe in you!
If you would like help with reaching your goals and feel ‘stuck, then contact me as I’d love to help you get there. http://www.cyscoaching.com
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